Message for JIEN =)

Dahulu kau mencintaiku

Dahulu kau menginginkanku

Meskipun tak pernah ada jawabku

Tak berniat kau tinggalkan aku

Sekarang kau pergi menjauh

Sekarang kau tinggalkan aku

Disaat ku mulai mengharapkanmu

Dan kumohon maafkan aku

Aku menyesal tlah membuatmu menangis

Dan biarkan memilih yang lain

Tapi jangan pernah kau dustai takdirmu

Pasti itu terbaik untukmu

Janganlah lagi kau mengingatku kembali

Aku bukanlah untukmu

Meski ku memohon dan meminta hatimu

Jangan pernah tinggalkan dirinya

Untuk diriku Sekarang kau pergi menjauh

Sekarang kau tinggalkan aku

Disaat ku mulai mengharapkanmu

Dan kumohon maafkan aku

Aku menyesal tlah membuatmu menangis

Dan biarkan memilih yang lain

Tapi jangan pernah kau dustai takdirmu

Pasti itu terbaik untukmu

Janganlah lagi kau mengingatku kembali

Aku bukanlah untukmu

Meski ku memohon dan meminta hatimu

Jangan pernah tinggalkan dirinya

Meski ku memohon dan meminta hatimu

Jangan pernah tinggalkan dirinya Untuk diriku

=)

everything has over.

i quited.

more challenge will coming soon.

=)

4/27

20 days ago.

i set a deadline for myself.

i gave myself 20 days.

if after 20 days still nothings change.

i will quit.

today is the day i shud make the choice.

continue. or quit.

i gave her the present today.

i slept on her arm.

i play her hair.

i touch her hand.

i made her dulan.

i made her laugh.

felt the feel of last time we are still together.

aih.

what shud i do?

everyone asking me to give up.

everyone asking me to find another.

seriously she have no reason for me to like her.

but i LOVE her everything.

whatever she say.

whatever she do.

i just LOVE her.

even she scolding me everyday.

staring me every time.

showing shit face to me always.

but im still enjoying it.

people say i stupid.

i say people dunno enjoy. XD

maybe she will say continue like this is better.

what so bad.

why cant?

i will say.

cant lo. haha

i cant feel any confident.

you are not belong to me.

and the wall between us is damn thick and wide.

she has a boyfriend and she love him.

but he is not me.

this the reason i always emo.

i know we will never get back together again anymore.

i wont feel happy like last time anymore.

blaming myself for not treasure the time when we are still together.

aih.

continue or quit.

i dun wanna quit.

i dun wanna continue.

i want her.

hou len diu ahhhh. zzzzzzz

dun cry dun cry dun cry dun cry.

yessss.

tml will be better.

argh!!

cum fuck me.

now i know the feel of heart pain.

being emo tis few days.
the feel is so so so so sanfu.
ur heart will pump vv strong.
and i can feel every time it pump.
and it begin to pain.
then starting hard to breathe.

until everything is over.

now im in a shit situation.
wan die cant die.
wan live cant live.
thought of letting go.
but i cant.
the poison is too deep.

i cant go further.

she dun wan.

what can i do.

wait?

im gonna lost everything.

crying every single night?

every time finish calling her?

im sick of acting happy.

i cant hide my feeling from you anymore.

i cant be happy anymore.

yeah.

im a sohai.

i admit it.

waiting for something that wont happen.

i really has no more other choice.

give me an answer please.

i dun wan to stay in this situation anymore.

all i did is just shit.

saw a post in fb.

just share.

男生在没有女朋友之前，生病了能捱则捱，实在不行了才去看医生；男生有了女朋友之后，生了丁点的小病都要告诉女朋友，不是男生变得娇贵了，而是因为男生喜欢看见女朋友为他担心的样子和焦急的神态，男生觉得这是一种幸福

男生在没有女朋友之前，吃饭不需要人陪；男生有了女朋友之后，即使女朋友不饿，男生也希望女朋友坐在对面看着自己想小孩一样狼吞虎咽的吃，男生觉得这是一种幸福

男生在没有女朋友之前，再累也不说累；男生有了女朋友之后，即使不累，也说自己累，男生希望女朋友用她那温柔的双手给自己按摩，男生觉得这是一种幸福

男生在没有女朋友之前，都是自己一个人上学放学；男生有了女朋友之后，如果偶尔有一次放学后没有见到女朋友，感到自己很孤独，无所事事

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是嘴上说“爱一个就是爱一个人的缺点”；男生有了女朋友之后，要用实际行动来证明这句话

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是认为女朋友做什么事都应该按照男生的意愿来做；男生有了女朋友之后，明白了女朋友也有自己的圈子，也有自己的生活方式，男生不能够干预

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是认为男生应当一诺千金；男生有了女朋友之后，明白了有时候也需要说一些善意的谎言

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是不理解为何女生喜欢流泪；男生有了女朋友之后，明白了那是因为她最爱的人伤害了她

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是对女生的伤心感到无所适从；男生有了女朋友之后，明白了女朋友在最悲伤的时候只需要男生抱一抱她，让她有依靠的感觉，仅此而已

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是认为女生喜欢浪漫；男生有了女朋友之后，明白了女生真正渴求的最浪漫的事就是和他一起慢慢变老

男生在没有女朋友之前，总是认为自己应当被别人疼；男生有了女朋友之后，学会了疼爱身边的每一个人

男生在没有女朋友之前，过着一个人的假期；男生有了女朋友之后，男生则是过女朋友的假期

男生在没有女朋友之前，过着黑白颠倒的生活；男生有了女朋友之后，生活变得非常有规律

男生在没有女朋友之前，还是一个男生；男生有了女朋友之后，才变成了一个男人